The (Grey) Highlander: So Boring It’s Almost Impressive!

Okay, buckle up, car enthusiasts, because we’re diving into the land of… well, let’s just say it’s not the most exciting place on the map. Today, we’re talking about the Toyota Highlander XLE AWD, a vehicle that’s about as thrilling as watching paint dry. But hey, someone’s gotta drive it, right? And I did, for a week, in Sunnyvale and San Francisco no less! So, grab your lukewarm coffee, and let’s get this show on the road.

Chapter 1: The Grey Ghost Returns

Alright, let’s address the elephant in the room—or, in this case, the grey blob in my driveway. Yes, folks, it’s another grey car. Not just any grey, but the grey, the one that seems to be the default color for 90% of the vehicles on the road. I swear, I’ve seen more exciting shades of beige. And this Toyota Highlander XLE AWD? It’s committed to the cause. I’m trying, I really am, to find some redeeming quality, some spark of personality in this monochrome marvel, but it’s like trying to find a lively conversation at a library – it just ain’t happening. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with it, it just… is.

Chapter 2: The Family Chariot Experience

Let’s move past the color (or lack thereof) and get into the nitty-gritty. This is where the Highlander shines, if we can even call it that. The handling? Unexciting. It’s stable, sure, like a really, really big rock. You’re not going to be carving any canyons, but that’s not what this beast is about. It’s about getting you from point A to point B with the least amount of drama and the most amount of…well, nothing. The ride quality is perfectly acceptable for its target demographic: families. This is the family chauffeur, the carpool king, the master of the school run. It’ll swallow up bumps and potholes like they were nothing, all while keeping the kids in the back semi-content.

Chapter 3: The MPG Miracle

Okay, here’s where the Highlander threw me a curveball. I wasn’t expecting much in the way of fuel economy from this AWD behemoth, but color me surprised when it managed a respectable 28 mpg (8.4l/100km). Yes, you heard that right! It’s like this boring grey machine has some secret, fuel-sipping wizardry hidden under its mundane exterior. I mean, I was convinced it would drink fuel like a thirsty camel in the Sahara desert, but it actually sipped it with surprising restraint. I still can’t figure out if I should be amazed, or just more perplexed by its total lack of character!

Chapter 4: Cabin Comforts (or Lack Thereof)

Stepping inside the Highlander is like stepping into a very…adequate room. The materials are okay, in most areas anyway. Nothing screams luxury, but nothing feels particularly cheap either. There’s an air of ‘we tried our best’ that’s hanging around, and it’s hard to fault the effort, even if the execution is just…okay. The seats are comfortable, I’ll give it that, and there’s enough space to swing a small cat (please don’t test this). It’s a practical space that prioritizes utility over wow factor.

Chapter 5: The “Toyota Logic” of Controls

Here we go again, the “Toyota Logic” controls. This is where my patience wears a bit thin. Everything is laid out in that classic Toyota style that feels like it was designed by someone who had never actually used a car before. Buttons are randomly scattered, menus make little sense, and there’s that irritating array of “bing-dong” noises that sound like the car is trying to communicate in some obscure morse code. It’s a system that’s clearly functional, but lacks any real logic or sense. I spent most of my week trying to understand why the hazard lights button wasn’t where my brain thinks it should be.

Chapter 6: The Rental Life in the Bay Area

Now, I didn’t just stumble across this Highlander, I experienced it in its natural habitat: as a rental car. My week spent navigating the streets of Sunnyvale and San Francisco really gave me a full taste of the Highlander’s… qualities. This is a car perfectly suited for hauling luggage from the airport, navigating the busy city streets (albeit not with any enthusiasm), and merging onto the freeway with no particular fanfare. It does its job, and it does it without complaint, but it never once made me excited to get behind the wheel.

Chapter 7: The Epitome of Boring

So, what’s the final verdict? The Toyota Highlander XLE AWD is… well, it’s boring. There, I said it! It’s the car equivalent of a plain white t-shirt. There’s nothing inherently wrong with it. It’s reliable, practical, and even manages surprisingly good fuel economy. But it lacks any sort of spark, any hint of excitement, or any kind of character. It’s a perfectly functional machine designed to do a job, and that’s exactly what it does, with no flair or personality whatsoever.

Chapter 8: Who Is This Car For?

This car isn’t for the adventurous, the thrill-seekers, or anyone with even a hint of a pulse of passion. It’s for those who value practicality over pizzazz, and reliability over excitement. It’s the perfect choice for the family who wants to get from point A to point B without any fuss, drama, or even a mild moment of enjoyment. And, I guess that’s a big enough market that Toyota will continue to make cars like this.

In conclusion, the Toyota Highlander XLE AWD is a car that exists, and it’s going to do a job, and do it well without creating any emotional response, and sometimes, I guess, that’s enough.