Chevy Tahoe : Loveable Land Yacht or Parking Lot Nightmare?

In the Beginning, There Was Size. A Lot of It.

Let’s just cut to the chase, shall we? The 2023 Chevy Tahoe is bloody enormous. On the outside, it’s like a small house on wheels. I swear, I saw a family of squirrels living in the chunky grille the other day. Inside, it’s like a cathedral. You could hold a rave in the third-row seating, and there’d still be enough space for a bouncy castle. Unlike most full-size SUVs, this third row actually fits adults – albeit ones who enjoy a slightly conversational driving experience, considering how far back they are from the front seats.

King of the Road (Except When Trying to Park)

Speaking of driving, the Tahoe’s sheer size took some getting used to. Imagine piloting a sofa at high speeds. That’s the experience. Now, in Dubai, where everything is built for these land yachts, it was a breeze. But I would be very worried driving it in Vienna, where it was all good with an Mercedes S as long as you did not stop anywhere, but that will be another story to tell so let me tell you, multi-story car parks became a game of Tetris, and parallel parking was but a distant memory. On a few occasions, I resorted to taking up two spots just to avoid contortionism while exiting the beast.

Looks? Well, Let’s Just Say It Wasn’t Designed by Michelangelo

Now, we come to the aesthetics. The Chevy Tahoe is, well, about as aerodynamic as a brick. The designers seemed to be working in low light – or perhaps after a particularly strong batch of refreshments – because the lines are, to put it mildly, confused. It’s not exactly sculpted beauty, more a blunt instrument designed to batter its way through traffic.

Brute Force, American Style

Thankfully, the Chevy Tahoe redeems itself somewhat under the hood. It boasts a glorious V8 engine that’s about as subtle as a sledgehammer. It guzzles fuel like a frat boy at a beer pong tournament, but hey, in the UAE, petrol stations were practically giving the stuff away. This engine has enough grunt to propel this behemoth around with surprising ease, even when laden down with passengers and luggage.

Tech That’s Both Brilliant and Baffling

The infotainment system is a real highlight. Google Auto keeps you well connected, and the sheer size of the screen makes watching in-car movies a treat. But here’s the thing – the screen is positioned about as strategically as a chocolate teapot on a submarine. It’s bolted smack dab in the middle of the dashboard, facing the entire car rather than the driver. Sharing is caring, I suppose, but it felt like an afterthought for the driver and a party favor for everyone else.

The Verdict: A Love-Hate Relationship

So, the 2023 Chevy Tahoe – is it a good car? Well, that depends entirely on your priorities. If you need to move a small village and its accompanying livestock, then yes, absolutely. If you crave a parking space that isn’t the size of a football pitch, then maybe look elsewhere. Ultimately, the Tahoe is a bit like a flamboyant, boisterous relative – you wouldn’t choose them, but you learn to love them in their own chaotic way. Just don’t expect them to win any beauty contests. A bit more down to earth and a manageable size would be the GLB as far as I can say, especially for the European roads.

About the car:

Chevrolet Tahoe 5.3l V8
Fuel: benzin
Power: 355 HP
Model: 2023